Finding the Light
by Cathartic Trance
Summary: Darkness is superior when all someone's ever felt is pain. A story of how two people help each other to heal they're inner wounds and find happiness. ... VinTi AU
1. First Meeting

**Finding the Light**

Chapter 1: First Meeting

I had been on the train for quite a while. It had been a few hours since I left Junon. They make the most incompetent railroad planning here, I swear. This train just winds around and around when we could just head straight to Midgar. I inwardly sighed and I sat in my isolated, dark corner of the train. No one sat here. Maybe the bums, actually, but that's just because everyone else shuns them away. And no, I, myself, am not a bum. I simply do not like human contact and only wish to be alone. That is why I work alone. That is why I travel alone. And that is why I am alone.

'Excuse me passengers, but we are sorry to inform you that we must head to Kalm before going to Midgar. We apologize for the inconvenience. Thank you.' A woman's voice reported from the scratchy intercom.

'This is just stupid. Plain stupid.' I thought. Just when it seemed as if the incompetence of this railway couldn't get any worse, it just did. I inwardly sighed again and sunk deeper into the shadows. If this ride was going to be any longer, I might just blow. This is exactly why I hate public transport. Too many people. And with too many people, there's too much human contact. And this train just keeps getting fuller and fuller and no one seems to be getting off.

The train slowed down and we came to a station where so many more people were waiting to board. Crap. More human contact. Less personal space. Pretty soon I'm sure someone will have to sit next to me or within a two foot radius. Not good. Why didn't I just take a chocobo? Or walk. I think all my assassinating has made my mind cloudy. I shouldn't have taken this job. Wait a second... couldn't I have taken a corporate vehicle? 'Oh, those sleazy sons of bi—'

My train of thought was interrupted when an average height brunette sat beside me. She did _not_ just do that! I looked around to see if she could go sit anywhere else, but the train was full. My luck never came to me. Only on missions. I just slunk back into the shadows so that once again part of my body was obscured from view.

I could see the girl... no, woman, look me over from the corner of my eye. Now why would she do a thing like that? It's not like I was a bum or anything. Maybe she knew who I was... No, that's impossible. I keep the lowest of profiles when it comes to my assassination missions. She seemed to be looking at me with sad eyes, though, as if she knew about my past and why I am the way I am. She scrutinized me and seemed to take in every detail on my body. Crap, it really did look like she knew me.

"Excuse me, but may I please ask why you're looking at me with such intensity?" I asked after a few minutes of her never-ending observations.

She blinked a few times in surprise and it was then that I noticed that she was beautiful. She had long chestnut hair that would go past her had she not been sitting. Her skin was flawless and unblemished. But what surprised me most was how close her eye color was to mine. I'd never seen a color like hers, save for my own, which were actually a brighter shade. Her eyes were wine colored and almost as red as my own. I found this peculiar, but decided not to think of it any further.

It seems that I was spacing out and staring at her for a while since she was trying to get my attention. "Sir? Excuse me, sir. Are you alright?" she asked when I finally snapped out of my reverie. I just nodded and she smiled warmly at me.

"I'm sorry for staring at you. You just look like an interesting person to get to know and you didn't seem too keen on talking, judging from how you keep to the shadows, so I just wanted to observe you." She explained. I just nodded, again. It wasn't like I was obliged to talk, and this woman already said that she knew I wasn't keen on talking.

After a few moments of silence, she began talking again. "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't introduce myself." She said. I glanced at her, gave a curt nod and then went back to sitting in silence, but she continued nonetheless.

"I'm Tifa. Tifa Lockheart." She said with a smile and an extended hand. I eyed the intruding hand warily before accepting it and grasping it with my own. Now I felt obliged to talk. Shoot. Oh well, there really was no harm in telling her a fake name anyways.

"Christopher Johnson." I replied. That was good. A common first name and a common last name.

"Nice name. But you don't really look like a Christopher Johnson." Tifa stated. Well, this isn't good. I wondered what she was trying to say. I always remember everyone I see and this woman didn't look the slightest bit familiar, so how could I know her?

"Well then, Ms. Lockheart, dare I ask, what do I look like?" I inquired. Tifa smiled in a lovely manner and hummed in thought.

"Something dark or mysterious. You look the type." She said. And she wasn't kidding. I was wearing all black. A black dress shirt, black pants, black shoes and black gloves, which I wear just to cover myself as thoroughly as possible. My hair is even black, and it was long too. My pale complexion clashed with my dark attire and it indeed it made me seem dark and mysterious.

"A Vincent, I would say." Tifa finally said. No. She did not just say that I looked like a Vincent, did she? This really isn't good.

"Now, why would you say that?" I asked her without sounding suspicious.

"I just told you, didn't I? You just seem to fit the name appropriately. That's all right, isn't it?" she stated simply. My eyes lingered on her for a moment, trying to figure out if she was lying or not, but she looked quite sincere.

"Well, um... where are you going to?" she asked after a few minutes of awkward silence.

"Midgar." I said simply.

"Oh, that's great! I'm getting off there, too!" she exclaimed. She was beginning to make me feel certain that she knew me.

"Why are you going to Midgar?" I inquired, trying to figure out her intentions even though I was incredible at profiling and knew that her intentions had no relation to me.

"Well, I live there. I go to college in Midgar and I own a bar to pay for everything. It's the Seventh Heaven." Tifa explained. I nodded. Yes, the Seventh Heaven. I remember that place. I've never went inside, but on occasion I would pass by it. The bar had decent business from what I've seen of people entering and exiting it.

"So... since I've told you why I'm going to Midgar, could you tell me why you're going there?" she innocently asked. I stayed silent for a moment, but Tifa still waited patiently for my response. Something about her made me feel like I needed to talk. I felt as if I could tell her anything and she wouldn't be disgusted, shocked or disappointed. And it irked me to know that someone like that still existed because I swore never to become close with anyone after my last relationship. I had another one of those inward sigh moments and answered her.

"Work." Was all I said. And it seemed to be a satisfying answer because she didn't interrogate further.

"What town did you visit last?" she asked. She really was an inquisitive person.

"Junon." I replied.

"For work?" she asked again. I nodded.

"Why were you in Kalm if you live in Midgar?" I inquired. This question seemed to lower Tifa's spirit. Her smile wavered for a moment before she answered.

"My father is sickly and he's in a hospital in Kalm. He hates Midgar and refused to be sent to that hospital after we moved from Nibelheim." She explained.

Nibelheim? Now this is peculiar. I live there and for the past 10 years that I've resided there, I never saw Tifa. Maybe it was because I was never really in Nibelheim. My house was there, but I wasn't. Maybe I'd spend a weekend or two there for a break from work, but other than that, I was never around. I thought about it for a moment before deciding not to ask about it.

Another awkward silence passed between us and I just slunk back into the shadows again.

"Tell me, Christopher," Tifa began, emphasizing my fake name, "why are so introverted?"

She just had to ask that question. Now I have that feeling where I have to answer her. I fought with myself for a while. Usually this is never a problem because I can easily ignore people and people could easily ignore me. But Tifa was very persistent and seemed so optimistic that I would have a real conversation with her. So in the end, I answered her.

"It's partly because it's my nature." I said. But she wasn't satisfied. I shouldn't have added in that 'partly'. I sighed, this time not inwardly, and spoke once more.

"And because I haven't had a very good life. I didn't have a good childhood and I haven't had any decent relationships whether friendly, romantic or even family-wise. In other words, I'm alone and I prefer it that way." Wow. I didn't know I could get so wordy.

Tifa gave me a look of pity but quickly covered it with a sympathetic smile.

"I'm sorry to hear that. But I kind of know how you feel." She said. Oh really? I'd just love for you to tell me.

She seemed to read my thought because she did just that. "My mother died when I was little. I can't remember her except for her appearance from old photographs. I had friends, but they never really cared. I hated high school because of all the backstabbing, so for a while I gave up on friends." I nodded, and for once, I was genuinely interested.

"I had a few boyfriends here and there, but they were just as bad, if not, worse." She continued. "I only had my dad, but he and I aren't too close anyways. We never seem to get along. It's only now that he and I are making an effort to make a bond because of his health." By now my attention was fully on her and I nodded again, signaling that I was indeed listening.

She smiled and began to speak with a happier tone. "I remember from Nibelheim a little spiky-haired boy named Cloud. I never spoke to him, but we ended going to the same college. And I think I've finally found someone who'll make me feel as if I'm worth something. He makes me feel like I'm not alone."

I was silent. There wasn't much to say, anyways. It's not like I was going to say, "Why, Tifa, I'm so happy for you! Congratulations!" because I was definitely not the type to say something of that sort. So I remained silent and waited for her to say something.

"Well, anyways, the point of me adding that last part is that no matter how hard and lonesome life can be, there's always someone out there waiting for you. There will always be someone who will love you and who will make you feel alive." She told me with a bright smile. With my pessimism, I found it unrealistic, but it was hard to deny it with her optimistic view on things.

By now, the train had slowed down and was coming to a stop at the Midgar train station. Tifa and I both got up and exited the train. I saw a spiky blond haired man standing on the platform and I was sure that it was Cloud.

"Look, Christopher, there's Cloud." Tifa said while laying her hand on my arm to grab my attention. So I was correct. I looked at Tifa and then nodded.

My eyes then trailed back to Cloud, who was now making his way towards us. I could see his bright blue eyes and saw something there that seemed out of place. It made me feel anxious for Tifa, but the human contact going on around me was driving me to leave.

"Tifa, I must go. Thank you for the conversation." I said. I took another look at Cloud before adding, for whatever reason, "Be careful."

Tifa gave me a quizzical look but I just gave her a nod, which seemed to be my signature move of the day, and left. I was severely uncomfortable in the crowded train station, but I couldn't help but feel bad for leaving Tifa. I didn't now why, but Cloud had a look in his eyes that made it seem as if he was going to do something severely wrong. Usually my assumptions of people were right, so I glanced back to the couple, but they were no where in sight. I sighed and left the train station, my mind full of anxiety for Tifa and with her still on my mind.

**

* * *

**

**AN:** Well, this is probably the longest chapter I've ever written. This is obviously an AU and the first chapter was in Vincent's POV. You all probably know that Vincent's an assassin, so there's no point in making you guess. Anyways, hope you all enjoyed!

I'll only write this once since it's pretty obvious:  
**Disclaimer**: I don't own it. Never have, never will.


	2. Darkness

Chapter 2: Darkness

I live in the darkness. It is where I belong. I don't like the sunlight, though I know it's good for my health. But then again, do I really care for my health? Don't I just want to die? For some odd reason, I can't help but feel like I can't answer those questions. It's as if I do want to be wiped off the face of the Planet, yet I know that there's something more for me. So I hold on.

I wake up in the hotel room. It smells like someone's been smoking, but I don't mind. It's not like I've never smoked in my life. Wiping the sleep from my eyes, I remember exactly what I dreamt of last night. It was of _her_. Tifa Lockheart. I remember exactly how our first meeting went even though it's been two years since. I couldn't seem to get her out of my mind even after all this time. And that same feeling of anxiety was tugging at me again. Everyday I felt as if something wrong would happen to her. But I couldn't go to her. I didn't deserve her company and it wasn't my place to meddle. So I ignored the feeling, no matter how bad it got.

Today I was back in Midgar. I was previously in Nibelheim to take a short break, but my peace is never left uninterrupted. I remembered that Tifa lived here the last time I saw her and I wondered if she still did. Maybe I could drop by Seventh Heaven today after I was done my business.

I checked the digital alarm clock. In iridescent red numbers, it read 4:30 AM. I was always one to wake up early. I rose from the bed and walked to the door and, of course, the file was here. I picked it up and walked to the little kitchenette to make myself breakfast before I read it.

A few minutes later, I sat down with some scrambled eggs and opened the file. There was a picture of what looked like an obvious pimp. I sighed. These guys were scumbags, but so easy to kill. Lately there haven't been any good targets around. I just shook my head and began to read his profile. His name was Alex Ricardo. He was 5'9 and a half, weighed 200 pounds and he owned a whore house called the Honey Bee (heh...), etcetera, etcetera. By now, I already made a plan to assassinate him, so I took the file and put it through the paper shredder.

* * *

There's no point in living. After all I've gone through I just wish to be off this Planet and out of this life. I remember how I used to be so optimistic. Now it seems so long ago. And you may wonder who I am. I'm Tifa Lockheart and I hate my life. So I took the knife from my bedside table and brought it to the skin of my wrist.

'Fuck it.' I thought. 'Just fuck it all.'

Today I might just be able to kill myself. I might be able to cut deep enough so that I'd die. The kiss of the steel on my skin was no longer strange as I slid the knife across my wrist and watched the droplets of blood seep out through the wound. Shit. It wasn't deep enough. It never is because truth be told, I'm too scared to die. It's really a strange thing, but somehow I keep feeling that someone close to me could help me. So I hesitate.

I set the knife down and glance at the clock in my dingy apartment. The glowing red numbers indicated that it was 10:50 PM. It was almost time for me to leave for "work". I sighed as I got up and rummaged through my dresser. The drawers were evidently disorganized, but I didn't care. Ever since he left me, I never cared.

Just the thought of him brought fresh tears to my eyes. Those horrid salty droplets were threatening to fall. But I held them back. I've become very good at that lately, in fact. But I guess it wasn't good enough because when I got to the bathroom I saw that my tears were falling freely down my cheeks. Damn him.

Cloud. What a sick bastard... He chewed me up, spit me out and left me here to die. Just because that bimbo was better than me! No... I kicked him out. I laughed bitterly as I thought of that day.

_I was walking down the hall to our apartment. I was coming home from work early today and I planned to surprise Cloud. I giggled happily as I thought of what could happen, all of which were very pleasant._

_Finally, I came to the door and tried to turn the knob, but it was locked. 'Hmmm... that's strange. He never locks that door. Maybe he's out.' I shrugged and took out my key from my purse and unlocked the door. I heard... sounds. Very strange sounds that I thought I'd only hear in hear in my house from Cloud in me. My heart jumped in fear, but I quickly shook it off. Cloud wouldn't do that to me... would he?_

_Come to think of it, he had been pretty distant lately. He'd leave late at night only an hour or so after I came back from work. I never really knew where he'd go, but he just said that he was going to a friends house or to a bar. When I asked why or if I could just come with him, he'd say "You won't enjoy it. And you're probably tired, so just rest, honey." And I always fell for it._

_I began to get really scared and walked to the source of the noise, not bothering to close the front door of the apartment. Shit. Did I just hear a woman's voice? And moans. No, no, no... This can't be happening..._

_Oh, but it was._

_I opened the door to our bedroom. OUR bedroom. And saw what I feared most. Cloud was there, yes... but on top of another woman. And just to think of what they were doing... no, what HE was doing, behind my back made me want to wretch. They didn't even notice me standing there. But I wasn't one to wait for things to just happen. Not after what I've been through. Not after finding THIS out._

"_Hi, honey. What's this I see?" I asked in a sickly sweet voice. All of a sudden, they stopped and Cloud turned his head towards m with a look of great startle._

"_It's not what you—" he began but was cut off._

"_It's not what I think, right?" I said. "Of course it's not what I think because it's ALWAYS not what I think."_

_He was silent. "All these lies..." I began but trailed off. I wasn't in the mood to lecture him, so I just muttered, "Fuck it" and left to the kitchen._

_Cloud came a few seconds later after telling that whore of his something. By now I had taken an onion out and was cutting it for the sake of it._

"_Don't cry, Teef." He simply said. I ignored him. Besides, I had an excuse to cry besides him._

"_I can explain this." He tried after a minute of silence, save for the sound of cutting. Again, I plainly ignored him and continued to chop the onions into smaller pieces. The tears were rolling down my cheeks, partly of pain and partly of the sting of the onions._

"_It's not my fault and you have to understand, Tifa."_

_More chopping._

_He sighed and said. "Look, Tifa. I know how this is right now, but you have to know this. I love you and I would never do anything intentionally to hurt you..."_

'_WHAT A LIE!' I thought as I stopped cutting and turned around swiftly._

_I bet he didn't realize how angry I was until my fist connected with his jaw. All my heart ache, pain and anger heightened my strength so the punch made Cloud plummet to the floor. He lay there for only a second or two before staggering up and holding his cheek with his hand. He wiped his mouth from the blood that was about to roll down his chin._

"_Yeah, I guess I deserved that." He said plainly._

"_Is that all you can say?" I asked with the same calm voice that I had interrupted him with._

_He opened his mouth to answer, but I quickly cut him off. "After all we've been through, you go off and do this?" My voice was a harsh whisper._

"_You knew about my past and it was only to you I'd confide. You know how much pain I've been through and yet you go and hurt me some more."_

_Cloud was silent. He knew that any attempt to talk would be silenced anyway._

"_All that you've been telling me lately has been lies, so how could I trust what you're telling me now, hm?"_

"_It's not my fault, Tifa." He repeated. I couldn't believe that he was still willing to lie to me. It was the stupidest lie that I've heard from him so far and it looked as if he was about to drop his façade soon._

_Mine had fallen, too._

"_NOT YOUR FAULT!" I yelled, giving up the calm voice._

"_Tifa, I—"_

"_DON'T EVEN TRY TO EXPLAIN YOURSELF, YOU SICK FUCK!" I screamed with rage._

_He remained silent._

"_LEAVE, GOD DAMNIT! I DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU, CLOUD!" I spit has name out like it was poison._

_And he left uttering an apology and goodbye. The whore followed._

_That was the last I saw of him._

I sighed and turned on the shower. I undressed and stepped into the bath tub. The heat of the water soothed me in some way. It would be red once it hit the bottom of the tub because of my wrist wound, but it didn't matter. Nothing mattered anymore anyways. For now, I was simply existing and nothing more for I am nothing. An empty shell of what I used to be.

**AN:** Gah, the argument scene sucked, but I'm not too good with arguments. I'm mostly into mope, brood and angst sort of thing, so writing an argument isn't really easy for me. Anyways, I hope you all liked this chapter. Next one you'll find out what Tifa does for a "job" nowadays.

**PS**: Thanks to my two reviewers! To Chaos' Plague: Yeah, I know that Tifa was bordering on annoying. I felt it myself, too, while I was writing it, but I needed to make her seem overly happy for finding a good life in some way after what she's been through. (There'll be flashbacks, so you'll understand her life better)


	3. Assassination at the Honey Bee

Chapter 3: Assassination at the Honey Bee

The Midgar air was and is still polluted and quite unhealthy. I couldn't see how Tifa could live like this... then again; maybe she no longer lived here. Yeah, the latter seemed to make more sense considering how lively and optimistic she was. She wasn't the type to stay in a horrid place like this.

It was already night time and the assassination would start in only a few minutes. I grasped the handle of my inconspicuous brief case before heading off to the Honey Bee. I remembered seeing an abandoned building not too far from it and within bullet range, so I'd stay there until my opportunity came.

The metropolis was busy tonight, as it always was and the closer I came to the Honey Bee, the more prostitutes I encountered. More than once did they try to grab my attention, but I had no intentions of going out of my way to give them any money, pleasure or not.

As I neared the unused building, I thought I caught a glimpse of a familiar looking woman. When I looked around, I saw no one of any considerable familiarity and just shrugged it off. Besides, Tifa's the only person here worth remembering and I highly doubted that she'd come to this place.

The building I would be staying in for the new while was old and worn out. No one seemed to notice it so it was a perfect place to hide while waiting for my target to appear. I opened the rusty old door and closed it behind me before ascending the creaky stairs. Once I found a good spot for my stakeout, I set down my brief case and opened it. Inside was a simple assortment of parts for a gun and I began to put it together. Tonight would be an easy catch.

* * *

I walked down the streets of Midgar. I wore a red tube top that barely covered my breasts and a black miniskirt that barely covered anything. I had fingerless black gloves that came up to my elbows to hide the scars on my forearms and wrists. My destination was nearing and I prepared myself for the night to come. I was going to the Honey Bee where I worked as one of the dancers.

After Cloud's betrayal, I gave up hope on everything. He was the only thing keeping me together after my difficult life and now I was just crumbling. I lost my bar to a business man because I had insufficient money to pay for bills and such. Without it I was unemployed and was forced to find other means of getting money. No one in the professional business world would take a girl from the slums such as myself, so finding a well paying job was difficult. I was broke and living in the streets for the bar was my home after Cloud left until that man took it away from me. When all seemed lost, _she_ came to me.

_She was a fairly old woman; probably around her mid forties or something. I remember seeing her look at me with pity in her eyes from the café window across the street. She looked kind enough with her soft brown eyes and motherly aura. I smiled weakly at her through the window before walking down the street to find something to eat._

_I was simply glancing around the garbage bins for something edible when I heard someone walking towards me. I instantly turned around and raised my fists defensively but then saw that it was only the woman from the café._

"_Come, child. You do not deserve to live like this." She said to me and it brought tears to my eyes. No one had ever been so kind to me without ever knowing me and it made me happy to know that she didn't think me to be garbage left to rot away in the Midgar streets._

_She grasped my hand softly and with a caring that I could never have felt with my own mother and led me to a building. A sign hung over the entrance and it simply read: "Inn". She continued on through the threshold without letting go of my hand and brought me to a couch in a small front lounge._

"_Please wait here while I get you something, dear." She kindly said before walking off somewhere. When she came back, she held a thick blanket and a cup of tea._

"_Drink this. It will help you with that fever you've come up with." She told me while placing her hand on my forehead. It was only now that I noticed how sickly I've been feeling the past few days. I guess that I was too numb with pain to notice._

_As I sipped my tea, the kind woman sat opposite me in a chair and began to ask me a few questions._

"_Would you please tell me your name?" she inquired. I hesitated to tell her for my caution had increased after Cloud left me and my trust would only go so far. When I wouldn't answer she just smiled and continued on._

"_I'm Uma Madrena, if you'd like to know mine." She said with a warm smile. I just nodded and continued to sip the tea._

"_I could give you a place to stay at my hotel. You could stay for as long as you want." She offered. Instantly I ceased to drink to tea and stared at her. She couldn't possibly be so kind to do that for me... could she? Seeing my bewildered expression, she chuckled._

"_Don't worry, darling, I'm not here to trick you. You look like a lively soul and I couldn't bear to see you wandering the streets broken." She explained._

_A moment passed in silence. Her gaze and smile never wavered and with such intensity, I set down the tea and began to cry. The innkeeper left her chair and came to sit beside me. She gently rubbed my back as I cried on her shoulder. No one had ever been so kind to me since mother died and I felt like I had something back after all those years of pain and misery._

_After my tears subsided and her soothing words of comfort quieted, I turned my head to look at her with my still tear-filled eyes._

"_I'm sorry for crying, Miss Madrena, but you're too kind to me. I don't deserve all of this." I choked out through my swollen throat._

"_Nonsense, child. You have every right to be happy. You'll stay in my hotel and you could work here to make money for yourself." She said. I shook my head._

"_Well, please just stay at my hotel for you cannot possibly find happiness in living in the Midgar streets." She insisted. I considered her for a moment before smiling genuinely for once and uttering my deepest gratitude._

"_There is no need to thank me, dear." She said before helping me to my feet and leading me to a comfortable hotel room._

I still lived with Uma Madrena. She had found out about my job and instantly demanded that I work with her. I told her that I didn't want to be a burden to her. She was persistent and held a good argument, but in the end, I refused. I didn't deserve such hospitality from this kind woman.

As I neared the entrance of the Honey Bee, I noticed a figure clad in black and I could have sworn that I saw that person before. His head turned to me and I saw familiar red eyes that I couldn't quite place where I saw them before. His gaze lingered for only a millisecond before he went into an old abandoned building not too far from the Honey Bee. I kept my gaze there before turning and entering the "club".

Inside was a bunch of drunken men trying to get some ass. I was disgusted by them, but knew that it was solely my fault that I was here. I just couldn't take Miss Madrena's offer even though it cost me to be utterly disappointed in myself.

I passed Alex Ricardo's office. He was my boss and seemed to favor me. It sickened me to no end. But I knew that he was my only hope to get money, so I treated him with respect no matter how much I wished to cause him pain. He wasn't a good man and if he wasn't dealing with whores like myself, he was dealing with various gangs in the city and selling them Lord knows what.

A few minutes later I was onstage and dancing.

* * *

I waited patiently like a cat stalking its prey. It was only a matter of time that Alex Ricardo would come out of the Honey Bee. My sniper was ready and I stood by the window. It was only a matter of time...

A few minutes passed and still I waited patiently. Prostitutes were walking to and fro flaunting themselves at passer bys. There were drug lords prowling the shadows tempting the addicts around. Even if I scorned them all, I knew I was no different. I was an assassin. A ruthless killer without a heart. After _she_ took my heart, there was nothing left of me except hate.

Lucrecia...

I closed my eyes for a brief moment and the memories played across my eye lids like a film on fast forward.

_Back then I was twentytwo years old. The day was sunny and the garden of the Shinra mansion was full of bloom. I was walking with Lucrecia through it. We were silent and just enjoying each others' company. I chanced a glance at her beautiful form. She wasn't very tall as she only stood 5'5". She had beautiful brown hair that shimmered in the sunlight whenever she moved and her complexion was the fairest that I'd ever seen then. What I loved most were her green eyes that matched perfectly with the nature around._

_She was a trainee scientist at age twentytwo, as well,and she had volunteered to go to the Shinra mansion to study since the mansion was renowned for its advanced technological and scientific instruments. I was simply here because it was a weekend and the Shinra mansion was only open to visitors during this time. It was my only time to see Lucrecia and I loved every moment of it._

_I had somehow come to love this woman after a year of friendship. There was something about her that I was drawn to, even after I lost hope in having a relationship with anyone.We'd steal a few kisses here and there but we never voiced our feelings to each other. For me, I think this feeling had started about a few months ago when she left to live in this mansion and now I was so sure of this that I'd come to a resolution. If I didn't act now, then I didn't know when I would be able to again._

"_Lucrecia..." I said. She turned her head to me and smiled._

"_Yes, Vincent?" she said while tilting her head like she always did when asking something or wondering._

"_What do you think of me?" I asked, knowing full well how foolish the question sounded. Lucrecia chuckled lightly._

"_I think that you're the greatest friend that anyone could ever have." She told me. The word 'friend' rang in my head and taunted me, but I ignored it and went on._

"_Are you sure that I'm only a friend to you?" I asked. Her eyebrows rose and she turned her body fully towards me._

"_What are you asking, Vincent?" she inquired. I sighed before continuing._

"_What I'm asking is... do you love me?" This caused her face to become rigid. She looked worried and it made me worry, too._

"_Vincent, I..." she abruptly stopped to catch her breath for tears were threatening to fall._

"_Lucrecia..." I began, but she cut me off._

"_No, Vincent, I'm sorry." And I knew what the answer would be. "I don't love you..."_

_I just nodded my head and accepted her answer without question. I wanted to put my hand on her shoulder and tell her that it was okay, but I couldn't bring myself to lie to her. It wasn't okay. I thought that she loved me. She even acted like it and those kisses we'd share... gods, it was too much. I clenched my fist and held back the tears for fear of ruining my pride. Lucrecia took one last look at me and ran off. I couldn't help but to follow her._

_What I saw was just too much for me. She had run into the arms of her teacher, Professor Hojo. He was holding her close and stroking her hair as she cried into his chest. I hid behind the hedges as I watched them. Hojo whispered something that made Lucrecia smile and then they did something that made me boil with anger. He kissed her. And she returned it._

_There was no point in returning to the mansion. I chanced love again and it just bit me in the ass. After that, I never spoke with her again. I feared to be hurt once more. I feared to love._

My eyes opened suddenly and I remembered where I was. It seems that I snapped back to reality just in time because Alex was walking out of an alley looking smug. I set up my sniper so that I was ready to shoot and waited for the opportune moment. I waited until he came into perfect range. He paused to light a cigarette and it was bothering me how much he was stalling. He began walking again and when he came into the perfect range, I shot. Twice, just to make sure he actually died.

The screams that followed were deafening. "Somebody call 911!" someone yelled out frantically. I wasted no time in packing my gun up and leaving the building. Police sirens were nearing the area and I had to make a quick getaway. I was a very stealthy man, so it was not difficult.

One of the windows in the back of the building was broken and not a shard remained on it, so I chose to slip through it. I landed gracefully on the pavement of the alley and walked back to the hotel at which I stayed at.

**AN:** Well, that's the end of this chapter. I know it ended kind of abruptly, but I need the next part to be separate lest I want this chapter to be overly lengthy. By the way, you all must have figured out that the italics mean flashbacks, right?


	4. Unexpected Coincidence

Chapter 4: Unexpected Coincidence

Just an hour ago Alex Ricardo, my boss, was shot. I didn't hear a gun being shot but I heard the screams of pedestrians even through the overly loud music. I instantly jumped off the stage, kicked off my black pumps and ran outside.

Alex Ricardo, big time drug lord and pimp, was lying in a pool of his life's blood. One ofthe prostituteson the other side of the street cried out in panic.

"Someone call 911!" she yelled.

It wasn't like I cared if Ricardo died or not. In fact, I preferred the former and silently wished that the police and ambulance wouldn't arrive in time. Besides, it was Ricardo's own fault that he got shot. He was doing some pretty risky work lately and I knew he was bound to be done in sooner or later.

I just walked back into the club and gathered my abandoned high heels. I didn't want to wear those uncomfortable things anymore and just walked home bare foot, although it was even more uncomfortable doing so. I hope I don't get bunions after this...

There was no point in going back to the Honey Bee. With the boss gone, I wasn't sure if there'd be business. There probably will be, but I wouldn't want to work with a new boss. They were all scum and when I got used to one piece of scum, he dies. Nope, I wasn't going to deal with them anymore even if it made me broke again. I began to reconsider Miss Madrena's offer for me to work with her at the inn.

Oh, fuck it.

I decided that I'd just go to a bar tonight and have a... "Celebratory" drink.

* * *

I had just arrived at the inn and I was now sitting at the kitchen table. Repentance. Lord knows I need it. I've killed so many people, and no matter how bad they were, I have sinned.

I'm surely going to hell for this.

I got up from the chair and went to take a shower. I needed _something_ to cleanse myself and this was as good as it can get. I couldn't simply leave my job for to do so would bring great consequences. Not that I didn't enjoy the thought of dying, but I'd rather kill himself than be hunted down. And I couldn't bring myself to death just yet.

Fifteen minutes later I stepped out of the shower feeling replenished in a way. I dried my hair and body before walking out of the hotel bathroom to get dressed. I took out another black dress shirt and black pants. I abandoned the gloves for tonight.

I was going to a bar and for one simple reason. To forget. It was like this after every assassination. Read File. Formulate plan. Kill. Forget. It was simply to lessen the reality that I had in fact taken the life of someone. And the pain of the hangover the following morning would be my punishment.

I checked the time. It was midnight already. I shrugged and put on a pair of black shoes before stepping out of the hotel room and walking down the hall. I took the stairs rather than the elevator because I didn't want to wait for it and then exited the inn. The front door was quite low and I was forced to duck a bit to get through it without banging my head. The front sign only said _Inn_ in glowing letters. Simple and to the point.

Walking down the street, I decided that maybe I could visit the Seventh Heaven. I remembered the exact location of the tiny bar and turned in that direction. What strike me as odd was that it wasn't there. I looked to the store at the right and left of it and found that they were the exact ones that were there the last time I saw Tifa's bar. Why then was it no longer here and replaced with a very peculiar looking store? There were a few possibilities such as Tifa finally moving away from Midgar. I shrugged it off and continued on my way to the bar I frequented on my visits to Midgar.

* * *

The taste of vodka on my tongue was bitter and it burned down my throat when I'd swallow. But it felt so good and the effects were great. I loved the sense of forgetfulness after several glasses was soothing. I didn't have to remember dancing on the poles. I didn't have to remember the filthy men catcalling me and handing me money. Best of all, I didn't have to remember my pain for just a few hours.

Barret, the owner of the bar, befriended me after a while. Said I was a sweet girl. Tried to cut me off once, but I convinced him to give me more. He'd always tell me how it would slowly harm me and that it wasn't good. Ha! That coming from a bar owner. I know he's just trying to care for me, but I need no one. My life is based solely on making it through each day and existing. There's no future for me. No love for me, neither.

I laughed bitterly as I took another shot. I arrived ten minutes ago and was now on my tenth. My stamina for alcohol had increased since my first time drinking large amounts, but even so the effects were starting.

"Barret, another shot please!" I called out to the bulky black man.

"Tifa, you really shouldn't torture yourself like this." He told me. It was the same thing everytime, but he gave me another shot glass-full of vodka.

"What am I to do then, Barret?" I said, "There's nothing left for me except a hotel room and alcohol."

"Try to better yo'self, Teef. Find a future." He told me for what seemed to be the thousandth time.

I laughed and downed the shot. Slamming the glass down, I said, "There's no future, Barret! How many times must I tell you? I can't better myself, anyhow."

The conversation always ended here. He'd never elaborate the idea of bettering myself for some reason. Oh well, it was better that way. I received another shot and downed it as well. The music in the background was beginning to fade to a quiet whispering, to me. My senses were deteriorating now. Ah, the wonders of alcohol.

* * *

I saw everyone that I expected to be here. They were all the same people I'd see whenever I came here... at least, all except one. I never expected to see _her_ here. I walked closer and sat on a stool not too far from hers. Yes, the long chestnut hair and peachy complexion were the same, although she did look a good deal paler than she used to be. She also looked quite skinny and was scantily clad in a red tube top and a black mini skirt. She was bare foot, for whatever reason and she looked drunk with a goofy smile on her face.

"Hey, Damien, whaddya want today?" a tall black man asked. For a second I didn't respond and then I remembered that Damien was one of my fake names. He always seemed to remember the names of his drunkards whether frequent or not.

"Whatever's strongest, Barret." I told the barkeeper. He just nodded and went to get my drink.

He came back a few seconds later and handed it to me. Muttering a thank you, I swallowed the liquid in the shot glass without even looking at it. My attention was still focused on Tifa, who was downing her second shot since I came in. She was looking crazily drunk and I wondered why exactly she was here in the first place.

She turned her head towards me and scrutinized me like she did on that train ride two years ago and then turned her attention to another full shot glass. Back then she was annoyingly optimistic and happy, but now she looked pained. It was evident that she was an alcoholic with the amount of shots she had consumed since I first saw her here. She was on her fifth and she must have had several more earlier.

Barret came back with another shot ready for me and followed my gaze.

"Yeah, she's lovin' those shots." He said. I looked at him and nodded. The glass in front of me was filled with the same alcohol that hers had and then I wondered just how drunk she was.

"How many has she had?" I asked Barret.

"Why would ya care?" he shot back at me. I could see in his eyes that he held deep concern for Tifa.

"I was just wondering..." I answered vaguely before receiving another shot and draining the glass.

"Righ', when there's otha drunkards in this bar, you choose her." He scoffed before going to get another man down the bar a drink.

"Hey, you!"

I didn't respond thinking that she was speaking to someone else.

"Heyyy! I'mss talking to youssh!" she said with a slur again.

I watched the clear poison in my glass slosh around then drank it.

A shoe connected with my head. "Yousssss sirr! Look ats meh!" she cried out drunkenly.

I winced at the pain throbbing near my temple and rubbed it gently as I picked up the offending shoe. It was a four inch high heel shoe that was black. I glared at Tifa who, despite the usual intimidation of my angry stares on other people, laughed. I guess she _was_ talking to me.

"What do you want?" I spat at her. I didn't mean for me to sound so aggravated, but the pain was becoming more pronounced with the blaring music.

"Yous lookssh familiarrr." She said with a cheery, alcohol-induced laugh.

She hopped off her stool and swerved toward me, unable to walk straight in her state. She stumbled a bit as she tried to make it to the stool next to me and when she finally did; she tripped and fell sideways onto the side of the counter. Laughing, she picked her self up and maneuvered herself onto the little stool and looked me over.

"You're hot!" she exclaimed with that horrible crazed grin that was beginning to annoy me. She wasn't in her right mind and it bothered me that she'd get so drunk. And her sudden impulse to tell me I'm hot was just too strange for me.

"Name... name... name..." Tifa muttered while holding her chin and staring at the counter. She looked deep in thought but I knew the information probably wasn't processing correctly in her brain.

"FREDDY!" she cried out suddenly. I raised an eyebrow at the name.

"No, no, no... that'ssss not rightss." She muttered. This time she squinted at me as if I was in some way blurry. Then again, I probably was.

"Ch... chri... Chris!" she exclaimed and then laughed triumphantly. I was amazed that she got my little alias right on only the second try.

"Tifa, you're drunk." I stated simply before downing another shot.

"Well, yous gonna be drrrunk, tooss laterrrr!" she said in a sing-song voice.

Barret eyed me queerly as he handed me another shot and gestured to the heavily inebriated Tifa. I shrugged my shoulders, not wanting to give him an elaborate answer.

"You knows Barrret?" she asked while drinking my shot. Well, this kind of is his bar.

I didn't think that last shot was very good because her eyes fogged up a bit and her head drooped forward a little. She recovered quickly and gave me a goofy smile before stealing another one of my shots of vodka, again. That one definitely did it because a second after she set down the glass on the counter, she swayed on her stool and then fell on me. She'd finally passed out.

Barret was too occupied with a couple of brawling drunks to tend to us, so I just handed the nearest bartender a wad of gil and carried Tifa's sleeping body out of the bar. The Midgar air wasn't very refreshing when I stepped out and I felt a little tipsy, but not so much so that I couldn't make it back to the inn without ending up in a ditch at the side of a road.

Tifa's dead weight was very light. Her head lolled back and forth as I carried her through the streets. I thought that I'd be forgetting the assassination of tonight and getting drunk. It turned out to be quite more eventful than that, though.

**AN:** It took me a while to write this chapter. These are probably the longest chapters I've written for a story. I guess I'm getting wordier the older I get. Well, tell me what you thought of this one. Oh yeah, and being that I'm not very far into my teenage years, I haven't really gotten too drunk or really seen someone severely drunk, so if my interpretation of a drunk person was incorrect, then please inform me and tell me what it really is like.


	5. Holding On

**Chapter 5: Holding On**

After entering making a few wrong turns and walking past the inn a couple of times, I finally got to my destination. The inn had a much more comfortable atmosphere than outside in the polluted air, and for that, I was grateful. I had just walked over the threshold when I heard the innkeeper, Uma Madrena, I believe, call out to me.

"Hey, you there!" She yelled out. I stopped walking and I heard the patter of the woman's steps approaching.

"Just what do you think you're doing with her?" the innkeeper asked in a raised voice. She looked angry for some reason.

"I'm bringing her to a bed where she can rest." I simply said before recommencing my stride. I had no time to answer her questions and my arms were getting tired from carrying Tifa.

"Oh, no you don't! Put her down this instant!" She said. I was becoming irritated. My arms were really starting to ache, my mind was fuzzy, and I was tired.

"And where do you want me to put her down? The floor?" I asked in an annoyed manner. I needed to rub my temples, but doing so would mean just dropping Tifa. I didn't know what possessed me to even bring her from the bar and I certainly didn't know why I didn't just drop her on the floor.

My question seemed to baffle the short woman. She closed her mouth and looked around the lobby. Couches, for whatever reason, were non-existent here and the benches were recently repainted, so they were also out of the question. I raised my eyebrow at her while she tapped her chin in thought.

"Look, Miss, just come with me if you're so determined for this girl's well-being." I muttered before continuing to the elevators. I was in no mood to argue with her.

She did follow me and we were standing in the elevator in an awkward silence. I was slumping on the wall, getting increasingly tired. If the alcohol hadn't deranged my mind so much, then maybe I could've remembered how long it was since I picked Tifa up in my arms. I could have sworn that the elevator was being slow on purpose because the second floor wasn't getting any nearer. The pain in my arms was beginning to make me really consider dropping Tifa right then and there, but we finally did arrive on the second floor.

I hurried as quickly as I could in my half-drunken state to my hotel door and tried to get the card key from my shirt pocket while still supporting Tifa's body. As I lay Tifa's head on my shoulder as I lifted my left hand to my shirt pocket, I caught a whiff of her perfume. It smelt intoxicating and it was becoming increasingly harder to get the key. That damned lady seemed to be enjoying my struggle because she had no intentions of helping me retrieve the only way of entering the room without damaging the door or its hinges in any way.

Finally, after much frustration, I got the cursed card key and pushed it into the slot. The tiny machine didn't respond for a few seconds before flashing green a few times. The quiet 'click' of the lock was heard and then I was able to open the door.

My hotel room was tidy and held no evidence of my little profession. Everything looked relatively innocent, but Uma was only concerned about Tifa at the moment and everything about me was bad in her eyes, at the moment. I couldn't blame her, though. I _did_ walk in with her in my arms, her head hanging carelessly from her neck, and from what I could tell, even when inebriated, this innkeeper was no stranger to Tifa and seemed to hold great caring for her.

I set Tifa down in a comfortable position on the forest green bed and attempted to get the covers around her. The feat was no easy task, but it got accomplished anyway. Afterwards, I went to the kitchen and got myself a glass of water. I massaged the side of my head as I sat in a chair and sipped the clear liquid. Uma was standing next to Tifa, watching her with a motherly look, but with a great deal of sadness. Then she looked at me with an accusatory glare.

"What happened to her?" She asked me as she pulled a chair out to sit. She held her stare on me and I just looked at her with the most intimidating look I could muster.

"Why must you know?" I simply replied. She scowled and her hazel eyes narrowed at me.

"You're probably a no good, rotten man who takes advantage of young, misguided women and I can't just let you do that to her." She explained while gesturing to Tifa.

"If that's true, then following me wasn't a good idea." I reprimanded before taking another sip of water. This caught her off guard and she looked frightened for a moment before regaining her composure.

"What did you do to her?" she asked again, obviously believing the worst. I noticed she was searching the room and calculating different methods of escape should her assumption be true. But I wanted her to leave, anyway and decided that being vague and mysterious wasn't getting me any closer to my goal.

"Look, I'm not some sick madman." I told her, although it wasn't too far from the truth. I was a killer, close enough to be a madman. "Miss Lockheart just had too many drinks at the bar and passed out. I did nothing but bring her here."

"How do you know her name?" she asked suspiciously. She was still searching. I was sure that she spotted the broom just a few feet away from her.

"Previous meeting." I said, not willing to talk any more than required.

"How long ago?" she inquired further. Gods, did this woman have to know every single fucking detail? I just wanted her to leave already.

"Two years. Now please leave. I'm tired." I told her.

"No. I'm not leaving you alone with Tifa." So she still didn't trust my words. Such skepticism...

"Then bring her to your room." I said.

"I would if I was strong enough and I'm certainly not leading you to mine or Tifa's room." She replied. For such a small woman, she was so damn persistent.

I sighed, gulped down the rest of my water and got up from my chair. This seemed to intimidate Uma somewhat and she looked ready to dash for anything useful to throw or hit with. I paid no more thought to that, though, and then headed for my suitcase. Only a few black dress shirts and jeans were in there, including the hygienic materials. I was planning to leave this morning, but now seemed like a good time to check out. The suit case was zipped and my coat and gloves were there, so I put the two garments on and picked up the bag. I checked around to see if I forgot anything and then returned to the kitchen.

"If you won't leave, then fine. I'm checking out." I informed her before heading to the bed to make sure nothing was forgotten there either.

I felt around the sheets for anything, but felt nothing. I hoped that Tifa wasn't lying atop any possessions, but I didn't recall seeing anything there. Nevertheless, forgotten possessions could be disastrous should the authorities somehow find out this room was occupied by an assassin, so I gently pushed Tifa out of the way. I heard Uma rise from her chair, ready to say something when Tifa's arm unexpectedly shot up. Her hand grasped my upper arm in iron grip and she rolled over, so she was facing me more directly.

"Please, don't go..." she rasped.

Her cheeks glistened with tears, but she still slept. She was either having nightmares or she was remembering something from her apparently painful past. Most likely the latter. I tried to tug myself away from her gently as to not wake her, but she wouldn't let go. I sighed and set my suitcase down.

"I won't." I whispered to her. This somewhat satisfied her and she released my arm, just to grasp a tiny bit of the material on my shirt, just in case.

* * *

The whole world around was blank. It was all just a void. A black mass of nothing. And I was standing in the middle of it. I felt so alone and I felt like crying. There wasn't anyone around to see me break down, but the tears wouldn't fall.

Suddenly, a white, glowing rectangle appeared. It looked like some sort of screen for a film and I stood there, transfixed by it. Then images started to play across the glowing surface. Images of my past. There were scenes of my first birthday, where my mother was still alive and we looked like a happy family. Then she was suddenly dead, lying in a coffin and my father was silently crying as they lowered her into the six feet deep pit.

More images flashed before my eyes and they all went in chronological order. None of my memories were happy. Only the first one and I was barely old enough to fully remember _that_ time. I was crying as the images continued and soon they become more recent memories. I wanted to close my eyes or move my head away... just _anything_ to stop seeing this, but my eyes couldn't leave the screen. I was _forced_ to watch this. I had to relive Cloud's betrayal and the loss of my bar.

I wanted to scream for anyone to help me. I needed someone to stop this, but there was no one around. I just kept watching as the memories continued to play, as my tears continued to fall. Then a dark and mysterious-looking man appeared on the screen. I realized that this was the only memory that wasn't in the right place. We were conversing on a crowded train ride to Midgar. His name was Christopher Johnson, but I knew better than to believe that it was the truth. But I couldn't remember what I thought him to truly be named. The name was on the tip of my tongue, though.

"V... Vin... Vincent." I murmured into the air.

He was leaving now, though. He was walking further away from me, but I needed him to stay. I didn't know why, but I just needed Christopher, or Vincent, or whatever his name is, to be there. To simply be in my presence. I felt safe when I saw him on the screen, but then I realized that he was no longer an image of my memory on a movie screen, but an actual person in the black void I stood in.

I had to run. I had to catch up to him. So I sprinted off to him. I called out to him, but he paid me no attention and I wondered if he truly was there. I reached out, but he didn't seem to be any closer than before. But just when I was about to give up, my hand enclosed around his arm and I held on as tight as I could. He didn't turn around, but I knew he was paying attention to me.

"Please, don't go..." I whispered into his ear from behind him.

He didn't seem to notice that I had said anything to him. I was going to shed fresh tears and give up on him when he turned around and looked down to me.

"I won't." And then it all disappeared and I remembered no more.

**AN: **Yeah, this chapter was kind of weird. It totally didn't go with the plans I had for it, so it just goes to show that I can't just plan a story out and have it come out exactly as I thought it would. Oh well, this was much better (and shorter) than I had originally thought it would be, so yeah.

**AN 2:** I'm getting some hits, but only 5 out of the many, many hits have been reviews, so if you read this story, please review. I just want an opinion and now I don't care for flames. I'd just prefer that it be more constructive than an actual flame.


	6. The Morning Comes

Chapter 6: The Morning Comes

Tifa had stopped crying. She looked almost content and she still clung to my shirt like her life depended on it. By now I had abandoned all thoughts of leaving the hotel. It wasn't that I didn't _want_ to leave; it was just that I _couldn't_ leave. Tifa's grip was very strong and everytime I tried to pry her hands off of me or try to get off the bed, she'd shed fresh tears and mutter things like, "You promised..." or "Don't leave me!"

"How strange..." Uma muttered after being silent for quite a while. She still stood near the kitchen chair.

I glanced at her from the corner of my eye, but I remained silent. When I did not ask her to elaborate, she spoke again.

"I usually know who people truly are even when they seem to be something else." She said while looking at the linoleum tiles of the floor.

"Why is it that I couldn't see past you?" she asked more to herself than to me.

I remained silent. I figured that she was too lost in thought to notice even if I did try to speak. She was still tapping her chin and staring at the kitchen floor. It seemed that it was a habit for her when she's deep in thought, from what I could analyze.

Then her head rose and she looked at me. "I just realized that I've never asked you your name." she stated.

I didn't answer her. She didn't exactly _ask_ me for my name. She merely stated that she didn't do so. Therefore, I was not obliged to say anything.

"Tell me" Uma said, apparently not bothering to find out my name, "how did you meet Tifa?"

"I am not obliged to answer." I muttered before looking at Tifa. She still slept soundly, but I knew that the morning would bring a killer hangover.

"Oh, but you are." Uma said in a confident manner.

I raised an eyebrow at her. "Is that so..."

"There's something about you that makes you seem... bad." She said, seeming to be at a loss for a word to describe me.

"You seem misguided... like you do wrong things." She continued, "But you have a good heart."

Ah, so this woman reads people on her spare time. Interesting. She wasn't too far off. Sure, I do wrong things. Killing people is among that long list. But she was wrong about my heart. My heart is frozen. I can't feel. I can't show remorse.

I can't love.

I looked at Uma and nodded silently. I didn't want her here, but she had no intentions of leaving obviously. And I was too tired to pick a fight. I was becoming drowsy and sleep was arriving. Normally, I would be able to stay up as long as I could, but the alcohol's effects, which mysteriously wouldn't go away or even fade, wouldn't allow that.

"Miss Madrena, please leave. I'm tired." I told her.

"I still don't trust you. Just go to sleep. I _am_ the innkeeper." She stated as if it gave her some level of authority over me.

"I don't sleep when someone watches me." I informed her. I doubted that it would make her go away, but my grit was inexistent at the moment.

"Then you'll be sleepless, because I'm staying here until Tifa wakes up." She said in a tone of finality.

"Don't you have a job to do?" I asked her, getting increasingly irritated. I felt like forcing her out, but I couldn't do that. I don't hurt innocents.

"No. I have employees. I just make sure that people pay the correct amount of money and don't cheat their way into a free room." She told me.

I ignored her. I was too drowsy to answer anyways.

"Tifa lives here." She randomly informed me. That's nice to know, but frankly, I was too tired to care.

My eyelids closed for a few seconds and I was about to fall asleep when I heard a light chuckle. I opened my eyes in irritation and glared at her as fiercely as I could. My glare didn't seem to work though. It made her laugh harder.

"You seem to have had too many drinks at that bar, too." She chuckled. "Just go to sleep. It'll do you some good."

Too bad she didn't know that I wanted anything but good to happen to me. The only good thing I wished for was her leave and I couldn't even get _that_. I felt like protesting again, but I was getting very sleepy. Then my eyelids closed and everything went dark.

* * *

Sunlight leaked through a window and filtered through my eyelids. It was causing me great irritation and made the continuous pounding in my head worse. I moved an arm to my eyes to block the sunlight and groaned in irritation and pain. I couldn't remember anything from last night except that my former boss got shot.

"I see that you're awake." A familiar voice said.

I opened an eyelid slightly, but it just made the intensity of the sunlight's effects worse, so I quickly shut it again.

"Close the curtains" I groaned. I heard the person chuckle.

Every movement they made seemed to echo and pound through my head and it was really painful. I heard the soft scratching of the curtains being drawn closed, the slosh of a drink in a glass and the patter of footsteps approaching the bed, all with intense clarity.

"Open your eyes and drink this."

I obeyed and got up slowly while trying to open my eyes. The room was fairly dark without the sunlight, so opening my eyes wasn't such a difficult feat. Uma was sitting in front of me holding a glass of Lord knows what. It looked like some gross concoction.

"What is that?" I asked while holding my head with a hand and squinting at the contents of the 'drink', if you could call it that.

"It's something that will help you with that hangover of yours." Uma said.

I looked at the glass with uncertainty before reluctantly taking it and sipping the contents. It was probably one of the most horrible tastes I've ever experienced, but its effects were immediate and the horrid pounding died down just a little bit. It was then that I noticed that I was sitting in a hotel room that looked nothing like mine or Uma's.

"Where are we?" I asked her before taking another disgusting sip of the hangover remedy.

"Someone's room. They claim to know you." Uma replied. It hurt to move my head, so I just asked her who.

"He's lying right there." She gestured to a place behind me.

I sighed before taking another sip and turning my body ever so slowly in the direction she pointed at. What I saw was completely unexpected. Chris Johnson, a.k.a. Vincent, was lying there sleeping soundly. The dream came back to me with such force that I doubled back in pain and almost spilled the contents of the drink all over the bed.

"Tifa, are you all right?" Uma inquired in concern while taking the glass out of my hands to insure that I didn't drop it.

I shook my head. The memory of the dream made the pounding and sickness I was feeling increase. My stomach was churning and I felt bile rising up my throat. My hand flew up to my mouth as I got up from the bed and unsteadily walked to the bathroom. Uma got up, too and gently guided me to the toilet where I immediately began to wretch. She rubbed my back soothingly as my stomach's contents spilled into the toilet bowl. I guess I drank too much and having eaten nothing before going to Barret's bar couldn't have helped my state be any better.

Once I finished vomiting, I breathed heavily and waited over the toilet just in case there was more. There wasn't though, so I rose, trying to ignore the familiar stench of vomit, and went to the sink to rinse my mouth out. I gargled a few times and brushed my teeth with a hotel toothbrush to try and get the nasty taste out of my mouth.

"I'm sorry, Tifa. The drink usually works, though." Uma said while leading me back to the bed. She had turned on the vent of the washroom and flushed the toilet.

"No, no... It had nothing to do with the drink..." I muttered vaguely while staring at the sleeping dark-haired man. He looked so troubled even when he slept. More troubled than when he was awake when we spoke on the train ride.

I rubbed my temples gently when I moved my gaze away from him. The hangover was still there, but it wasn't as bad as before. I took the drink and recommenced sipping it.

"What happened last night?" I asked after a long while.

Uma then proceeded to tell me about how he walked into the inn with me in his arms unconscious and of how she followed him here to ensure my safety. I smiled at her concern. She was probably the greatest woman that I've ever known. I loved her for being so motherly and kind to me and I wondered if she had a child of her own. I never asked her before.

Then she told me of how she thought that he was some madman and that she wouldn't leave me alone even when he insisted she leave. Then she told me how he was about to leave when I grabbed his arm.

"I did that?" I asked. It was just all too strange. It resembled my dream too much and I wondered what it all meant.

Uma nodded. "Do you remember what you were dreaming last night?"

I was silent and unmoving for a while before I nodded and agreed to tell her about my dream. I had so much trust in her that it would be of no purpose to not tell her. My head no longer throbbed as forcefully. It turned out that Uma's little hangover remedy worked after all. After a few moments of hesitation, I told her of the black void all around and then the sudden glowing rectangular screen that showed my memories. She had a look of sympathy but never interrupted me. That's what I loved about Uma; she always listened and only gave her opinion once she was sure you were finished talking.

"And then I saw one memory that was out of place." I said, "It was the one of when I met him." I gestured to the dark-haired man still lying unconscious on the hotel bed. Uma turned towards him and her eyes widened in realization. She smiled embarrassedly when she looked back and me.

I gave her a kind, apologetic smile before saying, "It's all right. I appreciate your worry for me." She then beckoned for me to continue.

"Well, I just saw a quickened version of our conversation and then the screen was replaced with an actual figure of him." I said. "His back was turned from me and he was walking away. I was running and running and then I finally reached him and begged him not to go."

The faraway look of remembering had disappeared from my face and I turned to Uma.

"What do you think it means, Miss Madrena?" I inquired.

"It's Uma, honey. And, no, I don't really know what it means. I guess that you should get to know this guy, though, to find out." She suggested while she jabbed her thumb in his direction.

"Well, Tifa, I've gotta go." She informed me, pointing to her watch. It was 8:30 AM and she usually watches over the front desk during this time. I just nodded and she left the room in a hurry.

When she had left, my mind was blank for a while. I didn't think of anything. But then I looked at _him_. He was lying neatly on his back. He looked very alert for a sleeping person and I wondered what made him to be like that. His attire hadn't changed from the day I met him, except that he'd abandoned his gloves. I then looked at his face. He was very attractive with sharp features. His hair was black and it contrasted with his very pale complexion. He had that slightly pained look as if memories of his past haunted him in his sleep, just like mine had. And I wondered if he really knew how I felt.

I glanced at my cloth-covered wrists and pulled off the black, fingerless gloves. The cold air of the hotel room penetrated the warmth and made the skin tingle. I had been cutting for quite a while now. The scars criss-crossed in every direction, the newest ones standing out more. My latest cut was still kind of raw, but it was beginning to scab. I wondered why I cut. Well, that's pretty foolish to think, though. I was depressed. I was lonely.

I was betrayed.

My thoughts strayed back to Cloud and that fateful afternoon. I felt the hate, anger, and pain rise up in me and I had the impulse to cut myself again. I needed to relieve myself. I glanced around, but I saw no knives. Uma didn't provide the hotel rooms with free steel cutlery. Only the cheap plastic ones were provided with the little amount of extra money she had. Without a knife or any means to cut myself, I felt those tears I hated so much reach my eyes. I wiped them away angrily and punched the mattress. I didn't want to cry. I felt even weaker than I already was whenever I did. I hated crying for Cloud. I hated Cloud even more.

The tears wouldn't cease to reach my eyes. They threatened to fall, but I wouldn't let them. My throat was tightening and I was about to sob. I couldn't let myself, though so I choked it down. I almost gave up and let myself go when I heard movement in Christopher's direction. I quickly pulled my gloves back on to hide the scars and I hurried to the bathroom to wash out my eyes a bit.

I heard a groan similar to mine when I had awoken. He must have had a slight hangover from drinking, but then again, he did get me here safely, so maybe not. He was awaking in any case and I wondered if maybe I should leave. Oh, damn. He was already getting out of the bed and shuffling towards the bathroom.

He appeared in the doorway clutching his head. Well, now I knew he had a hangover.

**AN:** Yeah, I'm having trouble with endings. Oh well, this will probably be re-written in the future anyways. I haven't had a hangover before, only seen my dad have one after Christmas and New Year's, so if I had the effects and feelings wrong, then forgive me. Oh yeah, and thank the Lord that has that review reply thing. Now I'll be able to properly thank all of you without adding an out of date message in the chapters. (I pre-write these. Some of the chapters are written waaaay before the next update) Erm, and sorry if Tfa seemed a bit, say, schizophrenic?


End file.
